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There are places I'll remember. All my life, though some have changed. Some forever not for better, some have gone and some remain. All these places have their moments, with lovers and friends, I still can recall. Some are dead and some are living. In my life, I've loved them all.

In my life, I love you more.
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ughhh its that time of year again fuckin valentines day WAHOO!
same old day different fuckin situation
haha oh lord i love my life. 
whyyyyyyyyyy do i always chose the assholes seriosly. probaby because i hate nice boys there annyoing i neeed someone who can handle me. im to bitchy and i would feel bad for bitching at em all the time. ahhhh someone needs to help me. 

only 24 days of cheerleading left and 4 competitons. everyones hates eachother at this point in time. we went to Gradn Rapids last weekedn to compete @ delta plex...omg..ewww we did so badd its ridiculous. we used to be ranked 3rd in the state well, no were 7TH!!! WTFFFF. no one think of the "team" they just think of themselves it pisses me off and coahc oenst make it any better fuck it i hate everything. sooo she cnhaed 1st round and too both haylies out and hailey j is a fuckin senior and shes not in any rounds. i flet so bad for her coach called her and left her a fuckin voicemail saying they need BULKIER PEOPLE in the back row...? Uhm ok that why she replaced her with 2 littlee people that she loves cause they kiss her ass. whatever im so over this season its not even funny. 

we've had 7 snow day in the past 3 weeks i love ittttt
i decided im gonna do gooos this term though...
conidering i have all blowoffs<3333

im hungry soo im gonna go be fat now.

holy shit i havent posted in her since last march
wow. a lot has changed
friends, new group fromed over summer SCROLL they are my loves and i spend 98% of m time with them "bithces wanna be us" so we've herd...
boys, not even gonna start that one...
family, borther gradutaed and moved to mtu for football. 18 hours away..
pretty much everything is different but i like it.

my brothers home for thanksgiving break all weeek
havent seen him in 4 months.

football game lohs vs. dakota last week
we lost, but i cannot even believe we made it that far to be honest
basketball season is starting soon even though i hate cheering for thoes game

competivie cheerleading started last weeek. we are gonna be so bomb.
i cannot wait till our 1st competition. DECEMBER 16TH @ Mt. Pleasent or w/e
lmaooo team brunch and then sleepover last week.
i love love love everyone its like one big family 
i really don't know what i would do without thoes girls

my grades suck what eles is knew
i did so shityy last term wow it was great. 
i'll get them up so no worries.
but im grounded this weekend cuz my grades ahhah
amazing rightttt


everytime i post a jounral im in the worst mood ever.

last week i was fighting with my best firend over some bamn boy. i know right a boy.there were only a select few that got where i was coming from but whatever. were stillf bff forrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr mofo' everrrrrrrrrrrr.the one girl who told me she was there and was tired of her shit went off and did the same thing to me this weekend. i cant trust anyone and it really pisses me off. because if i cant trust you i cant be friends with you, pretty much.

 i've been in the worst moods latley and im just not happy and i dont know why. oh god i soudn so emo, but everyday i have to fake a fucking smile because sooner or later, it's gonna be real. so i have to smile like nothing is wrong, talk like everything is perfect, act like it's all a dream, and pretend that none of this is hurting me so maybe I'll actually start to believe it.

through that whole episode i learnd alot. like who my real friends are and dotn trust everyone. i also came up with the theory that people dont change, they just become more of who they really are.

im actually trying do do good in school this term. 
i actually care this time.

my body is breaking down. from cheerleading and track i cant handel it. my mom wont let me go to cheerleading anymore durrign track season because its too much. i thought i had a stress fracture and i had to get xrays but it came out negative. my docoter still wont let me run for another weeek which fuckign sucks becase when i come back im gunna be slow as a mofo'  EMBARRASSING  MUCH?

WELL -- the whole boy category in my life is still doing pretty shitty.
whenever i fall for a boy he falls for one of my best friends. im tired of it. im actually tired of one particular boy who famous for it. then i started falling for the one boy who i thought i as totally done with. but this time im not gunna make stupid decision and fall for his stupid lies and the way he sweet talks me i mean every girl.i’m sick of playing the fool. i’m sick of following his rules. i’m sick of being hopelessly devoted to him. 

so pretty much what im trying to say it that at the end of the day, all i want is to be close to someone. someone to realize what im worth. someone to hold my hand for no reason at all. someone who will sit with me under the stars and not want anything more.



WELL - lifes kinda screwed up right now

ugh maadies party last weekend was reallly funnnnn
thats kinda were it all got screwdd uppp i didn someighng really stupid and messed everythign up between me and im soo sorry i really didint mean to hurt you i HONESTLY didi not know you liked me. blahh blahh this is so gay. uhm so yeah hes made at me and didnt talk to me at alll this whole week. then i was talkign to drew cuz they are friends and he was talkign to him at VIP in 311 abtou talking to me abtou the whole sitiation but he said that he talked to me he would start flipoing out on me so didi want them to happen so i was like whatever. then he called at like 1:30am so we could trakk and i guess were coool now and he claims  hes not mad at me but i dont belive him. i just hate it cuz now thinhgs will never be the same anymore =/

and i think i failed algrebra two which is fucking retarte i have all A's and then a fricken D in that class ughhh fuckkk me >:0

tackk all week i seriously hate tack you dotn understand and i have a meet nest tuesday vs. clarkston 
anddddd i haven tendonidous its when you muscles are ripping apart from your tendons FUN STUFFF

cheerleading tryoutts yestersayyy  made vasrityy again. im gunna miss beign the one of the babys on the team cuz now me sam bri and lisa cant gett away with any of the dumb shit we used to do pahahahah. we have 38 people on opur team wowo and shes we weren't "rebuilding"

VIP in 313 - fridayyyyy it ws pretty fun not teh best dance this yearthough. i hat having dances in teh commons it soo HOT and sweaty and shiit. my boobs were like poping out of my dress but it was ightt anyway. sam bri lisa any kay cam oer to take pics before as usaullll LOVE THEMMMM

SPRING BREAK NEXT WEEK!!! nothing to be excitged about since im not going anywheer. thin i gunna sneak away with my bro since hes goign to florida with all his friends.



state finals weeek like 2 weeks ago the night before was the best
our freshy dance was booomb ahaha thenn at end of the niight everyone started bawling cuz it was all coming to an end.then we left for state finals the next day and we placed 6th >:0 i was sooo pissed off! we hadd tons of mistakes like someone falling in jump roung rnadom? but ok and then someone stepped of the mat in round 3 ghh it was teh niight EVER! then we all went back to the hotel and tired to make the most of thiight. firts of all we were styign in th HO-JO the shiitest hotel of my life. and hteh pool was bout the size of a blow up kiddie square pool and then the hot tube was liek a life size ceral bowl SMALL!! and we had this little ass manger who was gettign super piised at us cuz all teh guys were in the pool horign around and we were playgin chicken fight in the pool adn he gotr so pissed of at us hahah the jess's boyfiredn wa slie "are ytou a mad elf do you need a hug"ahahahahah he was geeitn SO PISSED AT US! then we got in touble for being in the hallway and all this shit and then our couach was like "what are you goignt o ick us out of the this 5start hotles were staying in " acitng all sarcastic ahha GOOD TIMES!

uhmm trakk started lasttt weeek - some on eplease kill me now
drama is still going on. ughh i hate this i HATE DRAMA and i just wnat it to be over
i dont have a problem with you so just please stop thankss :]

cheerleadign banquet last sundayy :/
everyone was bawling there eyes out. i cant believe this season is already over i love the seniors so much and i dont know what i am going to do with out them. i became so close to all them and the team they were liek my second family. everyone got along and it was drama free!!! they started this new thing were the seniors had to pick there favortie underclassmen to pass something special on to. and alycia picked me, she passsed on her bells army hat and then she sayed"this girl reminds me so much of myslef when i was a freshamn adn ive bcoem so close to this girl...." and at that moment we both started crying hystericaly lol . i seriouly love her she was liek the big sister i never had, she was always there for me and we always made eachotehr laugh. i love her so much and i dont kno wwhat im going to do with out her next year. but im going to go visist her at state so that exciring!
im alsooo going to miss, morgan and amy and stef micef and jess and kendall and kallee and carly and stef wither and stef duda and on and on

shes having a HUGE party tomorrow and if your not invited we obvioously  DONT LIKE YOU 
which reallly sucksss cuz i woudl be pissed but shes one my bestt friednss 
so its ok to jealousee ahahahah ;}


oh yeah, im doing really bad in school, i mean algerba 2.
its not like i stoped trying i just dont get it 
and mr.mckay goes soo fast i dotn know what the fuuucck hes talkingabout!
i wouldnt be surprised if i got a "possible faliure" notice sent home
ughh im gunna be dead!!!


winter breaks over. i seriously hate lake orion we only got two day off >:0
+ basketball game vs. southfield then post game which was really funnn 
+ competiton at chesaning which is 13942x hours away and we got 7th our of like 9 teams oh god not a good one for us.
+ maddies with the girls sleeding and burying mindy in the snow and jumping of couches and d wives and prankinggg
+ mallin on monday with the abbie and kay kay and bri and randa then mindys housee afterr with abbie and kay kay and bri and jackie and maddie then blockbuster "mom its fine i walked in on you and dad ok its fine"ahahah mindy is so funny!
+ tuesday orderd my varsity jacket finally then went to the game vs. ponti-crack northern with sam and bri. this is where the drama started. basically jaclyn txted brett talking about sam then i was like wtf what did she say then she drove past us making throw up nosies then she called us and we were all bitching back and forth. and all that was unnecessary drama over a dumb little boy. and im happy because there's only 15 days till we get to beat some ass.

schooool and cheerleading practicee lyk all weeek

team dinner friday @ carlys then me sam and bri went to bris and then we went to apple bee's and meet up with l-sang and lisa and chris and nicolett and dom and on and on then we went to micky d's and saw 5847x people at like 10 o' clock

competiton @ CHS saturdayyy we got 3rd =/ 
nicoles house after with randa and miny and stacie
such a funn night. i love thoes girlss. me and randa pied our pants like 3489237 plus times cuz we had so manny laugh attacks lol. and we walked around nicoles hood in the freezing coooldadn visited kay kay say no no






valentines day is in four days and counting. oh boy.
this is probably the most dreaded day of the year.

oh well though.
a large large large majority of the boys in our school
are way to immature to know how to handle a relatinoship.
sex sex sex is all the think about.

i wish i had someone to hold hands with.
i don't want a boyfriend right now.
but i want to be "together" with someone.

lifes kind of dull rigth now. not to exciting, and i need excitetment. 
drama drama drama, so much of it. 
i usualy love it its entertainment for me but now its just annoying.
especially when its about boysss ughhh it ssuch a waste
andd there like 54742 million rumers goign around abotu me and friends
saying we're sluty freshman that have sex with seniors
well guess what bitches:
ughh i hate girls who talkkk shittttttttt they are obviously obbssed with us

bri andersson and lissa-g got pulled up to varsity
yeah! now i have my two best friend on the team
sammmm anddd briiiiiii
i haven't hung out with bri in FOREVER and i love her 
and shes like me life and we dont hang out anymore nearly as much as we used to 
and im so happy shes on varsity cheer now so we can be tiiight again
even though we are tiight as spandex stiil, things are just different.

this is my first weekend i havent had a cheer competition in like 245203976 weeks
i like the break but im ready for our next competition - SATURDAY, FEB 17TH @ CHESINING
we won  leagues last saturday and beat thoes rochester bitches i love seeing them cry
ahh im so mean but its about time some on beat tehr asses. our teamm is pretty much the shit
hell yeahhh boiii we are soo flyyy ni69aaa.

uhm last saturday after the competition we alll went to calry's for a team party 
then me sam alex's marrisa and kayla went to sam's

sam alex's and I went to wrestling leagues @ stoney creek 
and met cute boys and drank monsters and played ddr and other shiit.

we were gunna go sledding with the boyss but alex's had to leave 
so we took a snow check for next monday durring break
soo i went to lunch with sam and did homework and went to dinner with fam 
and im waiting to see if bri's gunna call me ever to hang tonight
i have a feeling she's not going too.

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but it wasnt to fun i slept all dayyy. and didnt go to randuhhs raveee. i decided to study for my bio exam becuse i really want to get my grade up to an A. the one day i didnt have cheerleading i didnt even do an thing i was pissed. but happy that cheerleading was cancled because mondays are HELL DAYS

lately ive been thinking about lots of things. like how i fall for pretty boys that give my false hope. im tired of that and the bullshit he brings.i'm not saying i don't want him...`cause believe me, i do.i'm just notgoing to chase after him. i've just decide unless it's mad, passionate, extraordinary love, it's a waste of my time. there are too many mediocre things in life, & love shouldn't be one of them.


last saturdayy was ashley best friend oliveri's brithday
and lea taylor jessica lauren and i + the burf day gurl went out
then wen to the movies at lyk 1030 to see freedom writers
and lea was being obnoxious and was lucky she didnt get shott

hardcore cheerleading practice on monday
shooot me onn the headd.
since we are such lazy fat asses our coach thought of this new AMAZING 
conditioning program adn it KILLS! then we have to go to gymnastics right after
i was soo dead and we have to do this ever mondayyy

we came in 2nd to rochester of cousre but only 
20 points behind them and we beat them in round 3!
unfortunetly 2 of my stunts fell. and i felt so bad for tiff 
because she cried like all night because she thought it 
was her fault. i lovee her soo muchhh

we came in 1st, but we didnt really have any competiton.
we scored the best we ever have in round 1 which was an amazing feeling
beaucse we worked so hard.
then out for the night 
with stef and bri we went to the mall and saw  stomp the yardd 

lately my schedule has been flat out cheerleading. one of those things that just seem to consume your whole life. I'm always tired, and i'm always sore somewhere, but it all pays off. as much as I may say I hate it, I love it and without it I'd be a lazy fat ass. i have practice every night and a competition every weekend, i think i get like 1 saturday off so that makes my weeks go by slow, and my weekends too fast. time is something I find hard to spare, even though I spend most of it sleeping and trying to relax because I never get too.  i have no time for my friends which is pretty much why they are all cheerleaders so that way ill be with them all the time and i have no time for my boys >:0

today, i went ot the auto show and it was gay as hell
im not a big car fan my dad works for GM so i gotta support him

tmrwwwww lake orion is THE ONLY school who has school on monday
and lucky fom me im black and my moms not making me go!
ahah jelous are we :] randa is having a black party even though shes white lol
i lovee herrr 
so ill be @ that party + shopping + major studying for finals + hell day at cheerleading


goodbye 2006
hello more fucking drama
my brother graduates this june! im gunna miss him so much

so here it is. another new year.
another moment in my life to fill
my life with resolutions
that ill forget the next day.
we all make them.
we make them just so that we can break them.
it`s like a rule.
like everyone has to break
their new years resolution.
mine last year was to lose weight.
then they built coldstone right across from my house && everything changed
gaksdfblaks lol =]

my break consited of nights with my fav girls and going to ohio to visit the Allens and the Feltons
wasnt to fun since i was in ohio likeee allllllllllllll break =[ major unhappy face right thurrrr

got my north face and new uggssss
shut up, i know i follow the crowd
i lyk rly rly rly wish i didnttt.
some one help plzzzzzzz me
ok im done lol.

im in such a good mood right now! its like12:50 AM
on a fridayyyyyy well, now its saturday and i just got
back form apple beesafter the varstyyy bball game with
some of the cheerr teammmm. that was my first varsity
game i actually got to sit in the crowd and watch cuz im
alwayss cheering @ the varsity gamess. but it was funn

i'm gettgin a cold
and in not to happy about that

buttttt today
is ashley best firend oliveri's 15th bday!
ahh i love her and were goign to see
freedoms writers and then were going outtt
yay! i love that biaaaa

k well, im tired and my throat hurts
i wouldnt be supprised if i woke up w/ strept rmw morning

ughhh i ahet that


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